Still the One

Jer and I are just about to hit our second wedding anniversary.  I KNOW!  For a guy who never thought that he’d be able to legally marry, it’s a big freaking deal (even though our stupid state doesn’t recognize our marriage…whatevs).  We were sitting around talking about when we first started dating last night and we hit the topic of “the moment”.

You know what I’m talking about…the moment when you realize the person you’re with isn’t just a boyfriend or girlfriend anymore, but has become someone you truly love and want to spend your life with.

For me, it happened in Niagara Falls, Ontario.  A few months after we moved in together, I was sent to New York state for work for a week.  At the end of the week, Jer flew up and we drove across the border into Canada to spend some time in Niagara Falls.  After spending a week apart (our longest separation at that point), my heart jumped out of my chest when Jer finally walked into the door that Friday.

We had a really busy few days being tourists, seeing the sights and taking in all of the local culinary flavor.  But what struck me the most was how much, even when surrounded by the most beautiful scenery I’ve ever seen in person, I really just wanted to be alone with Jer, snuggled up talking.

I have dozens of pictures of The Falls, but here are my favorite pictures from our trip:

Above: Jer raiding the mini-bar and grabbing some $8 M&Ms.
Below: Jer enjoying the $8 M&Ms (I’m still bitter about the price) in our suite while watching The Falls.  We were on the 42nd story and the view was GORGEOUS!



While we were on the trip I realized a lot of different things about our relationship. I realized that I hadn’t been fair to Jeremy from day one. I came into the relationship with extra baggage from past situations that left me feeling scared of trusting him or opening up fully. Because of that, I had been keeping him at bay emotionally. I also realized that I never wanted to spend another day without him by my side. I knew that I loved him before the trip but I had no idea just how much I loved him until we spent our weekend in Niagara Falls. I realized that I had to change – to figure out how to take down my walls and let Jeremy in – if I wanted to build a relationship that would last a lifetime. And so I made a resolution to myself on our flight home that I’d love him completely and without reservation. And, for the most part, I have every day since our trip.

Shortly after our Niagara trip, we got engaged. 6 months later, we got married in Iowa. Then along came Bean. For me, “the moment” was a choice. I had to decide whether or not I would allow myself to go past the “boyfriend” stage knowing that I could eventually be hurt or have my heart broken. But something inside me knew that Jeremy was the only man for me from the first day I laid eyes on his perfect ghetto booty. He had me at hello. :)

All of these years later, I realize that the decision to love Jeremy is the single best decision I’ve ever made. He’s the most kind, loving, supportive and tolerant man I’ve ever met. If you know me in real life you know that I’m a big personality and I’m a handful at times. Jeremy handles my quirks with such grace and with a good-natured laugh. He’s a saint.

Good decision, Ry – good decision. :)